Posts by Gary Applegary
Lizards
I could use the word “gizzard,” ’cause then it would rhyme, But there aren’t any gizzards in these lizards of mine. If they had the chicken’s internal design, Then lizards with gizzards would work out just fine.
Read MoreSlug
Slug, slug, Sitting on a rug. You make that trail? Slug just shrug.
Read MoreWee Shirley
It’s always a good time when Grandma comes to visit. This was from several years back to commemorate Grandma’s stay in Florida. So much thanks and love to Grandma. Miss her lots.
Read MoreA Little Known Fable About a Big Known Guy
No doubt, most of us have heard of Paul Bunyan. Yes, the giant feller who lumbered through the forests removing natural resources at a pace not even machinery could keep up with. Chopping down trees right and left with his big blue ax he named Babe. Dressing in plaid flannel even before the 1990’s. A big…
Read MoreWhat’s the Difference Between Jam and Jelly?
Admit it, you’ve been wondering. Okay, the back story. It was the 1990’s, and I was heavily into a band named They Might Be Giants. (Still am.) One day, inspiration struck. “What’s the Difference Between Jam and Jelly?” seemed exactly like the type of song that TMBG might record. But first, I had to be accurate.…
Read MoreYou Sort Of Got Mail
Isn’t it nice to get a letter from .. someone… somewhere? Sometimes, I suppose. Well, here you are, Whoever-You-Are! I really used to enjoy all the free stationery and pens that hotels used to give you. So much fun to write letters to… well, anywhere. Those were the days, I guess. Did you ever use…
Read MoreEat Your Applesauce! (Matthew!)
I’m not quite sure if the moral to this whole story is that a) eating applesauce is good for you, or b) making fun of someone eating applesauce is NOT good for you. At any rate, a couple of letters straightened out the whole deal: I know, I know… Nobody likes a tattletale! But…
Read MoreRegarding Being An Optician
I remember this doodle as if it were 14 years and 16 days ago… I faxed it to my wife-to-be (now my wife-who-is) from work during my break from the madness that is being an optician. The fellow in the middle of the complainers was a rough cariciature of myself, (I did and do actually have…
Read MoreShorty and the Citrus Squeeze
Recently while visiting Florida, I saw the following news snippet from the St. Petersburg Times: Being on vacation (and unemployed), I thought I’d give it a try. I did some research and scrawled some notes… I know, I know, kinda sloppy and muddled. So, many many edits later, this is what I came…
Read MoreT.Y.P.E.
The message here is simple. If your doctor says take your heart meds, blood pressure meds, brain pills, spleen meds, etc every day, then Take Your Pills Everyday. None of this experimenting, “Let’s see what happens if I don’t take these for a few days.” What usually happens is, you don’t feel so well. Listen…
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