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The Gross Bacteria-Laden Necktie Sanitizer, a.k.a. The Sani-Tie-zer

By Gary Applegary | August 23, 2010 |

Think about it. Neckties get sneezed on, straightened out in the restroom after… whatever… they get food spilled on them, drooled on, and what about your Doctor’s tie? Imagine the viral strains, bacterium, and molds making their home there! And yes, as much as we like to wash our hands and spritz alcohol based sanitizers on them every few minutes… how often do our ties get sanitized? What’s that? NEVER? Ugh! That could change, to the joy and health of tie-wearers and those who hug them or come in close proximity to their cruddy cravats.

Here’s a rough sketch of how the Sani-tie-zer works..

Okay, so you can see by the highly scientific rendering above, one simply has to throw a bunch of yucky ties into the dryer, add an anti-microbial dryer sheet, and let ’em go round and round a few cycles. The germs, bacteria, etc get dizzy then get decimated. Ties come out as promised, crisp and clean. Ta da!

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To Tank, or Not to Tank? A simple fashion guide.

By Gary Applegary | September 10, 2023 |

Sun’s out, guns out! Should I wear a tank top? Answer one question and we’ll give you your answer: Are you Wolverine? You’re welcome!

MIGHTY BITEY

By Gary Applegary | October 11, 2021 |

The town population of warm Treasure Shore Is small, but it used to be quite a bit more.   Then a huge angry shark terrorizing the beach Started snatching and snapping up all within reach.   All sizes, shapes and colors of people he ate, A person-eating shark does not discriminate. The first victim had…

The Wrapperer Snapperer

By Gary Applegary | September 6, 2021 |

Winifred Wallaby Weng was a mostly good little kid. Always listened to Mumma; well, most of the time she did. She studied for tests, cleaned her room, obeyed the babysitterer, But the little girl with the adorable smile was a careless, frequent, litterer. “Pick up after yourself, Winnie!” was Mumma’s constant reminder. But everywhere that…

Slowpoke Cowpoke

By Gary Applegary | September 26, 2014 |

SLOWPOKE COWPOKE Deep in the heart of Dallas Fort Worth Lived the fastest cowpoke in all of the Earth. Zebedee Zoom was snappy and stealthy. It kept him sharp, and it kept him healthy. Whenever a job had to be done, Everyone knew that old Zeb was the one. Yes, Zoom was the man—he was…

Hey, Me!

By Gary Applegary | September 20, 2014 |