Today we interviewed Cecil C. Serpent.

GAK: Today we’re visiting with Cecil, the Sea Serpent…

CSS: The winged sea serpent.

GAK: Ah, and you speak italic, as well.

CWSS: (Silence.)

GAK: So, as a winged sea serpent, you’re very rare, no?

CWSS: Well, there’s a few of us, so I would say medium rare.

GAK: Well done! Well done.

GAK: Moving on…. The Drac! Is he a relative of yours?

CWSS: The Drac is a MYTH.

GAK: I’m sorry… So is SHE related to you?

CWSS: The Drac does not exist. It is a contradiction to itself, described as an invisible shape-shifter that takes the form of a winged sea serpent. How does anybody know that, if it’s invisible?

GAK: Great point, Cecil. It would seem that if you were invisible, shape-shifting would lose its impact as well. I’m an invisible spider! Wait, now I’m an invisible piece of tiramisu! Don’t eat me! Look! Well, you can’t look, but I just turned into an invisible semicolon!

GAK: Moving on… So, you’re a sea serpent, a winged sea serpent, that is to say… Do you live in the sea?

CWSS: No, as you know, I live in your basement.

GAK: Yes, I sea. Well, I hear you’re quite the music buff. Have you a favorite genre?

CWSS: Oh yes, I love the oldies!

GAK: Ahhh, like Dominique Vellard, or Hildegard von Bingen?

CWSS: Medieval music? No. I am not a dragon, I am a…

GAK: Winged  sea serpent, yes. Quite sorry. So what sort of oldies might we find Cecil enjoying?

CWSS: I prefer 50’s music; Buddy Holly, Chuck Berry, Elvis, and such.

GAK: I bet you like “Great Balls of Fire!” Right? See, cause you breathe fire…

CWSS: Again, THAT would be a dragon, which I am not.

GAK: Yes, we’ve certainly established that you are one winged sea serpent, indeed. So… Favorite song?

CWSS: “Chantilly Lace!” This is the Big Bopper speaking…

GAK: Ahhh, well thank you for that mini-performance. You know, Mayan mythology features a winged serpent. Are you Mayan?

CWSS: Of course I’m yours! That’s why I live in your basement.

GAK: Well, we’ve about covered the essence that is you, Cecil. Any last quotes for us today?

CWSS: A wop bom a loo wop, a wop bam boom!


POSTED ON August 7, 2010 BY Gary Applegary

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